Purged

Yes i just purged. i had to. i was 111lbs. i am so digusting its unbelievable.
my friend melody* came down an we wer drinkin and eating chocolate. you know them 'funsize' bars.

now shes gone and the first thing i did when she left was weigh myself.
first it came up as 8stone. then 7 stone 13. omg tha it absoultely terrible.
tomorrow im going to work out like mad.

i never normally purge. but the drink an the fact i am so fat made me do it. my eyes are watering and i feel all werid. but thats my own falut for eating so much shit.

i rung my boyfriend too. i didnt expect to get through as hes not even in this country but he answered. just listening to his voice made me wanna cry. ive missed him so much. he said he should be home at 1pm tomorrow afternoon an tha hes coming to see me. which is great as i thought he'd be home too late, so i wouldnt be able to see him.

and what does he have to come home to? i huge fat overweight cow.
well thats all changing. monday morning im not going to be like this anymore. im going to be the devoted person i know i am inside. cuz i no i still have the anorexic brain, but the rest of my body doesnt seem to be joining in. which is really starting to get me down. so its changing :)
i now offcially declare myself fat therefore i must to what i have to, to become the person i wanna be.

sorry for going on...but i have to get this all out of my system.

love you all guys... hope your doing great :)

xxxxxxx